By Pressmin Spurious
Intergalactic Times staff reporter
Well my dear readers, things are getting ugly on the campaign front. Now there’s all kinds of screaming going on over JJ’s use of the N-word. I don’t see what all the fuss is about. I speak of Nader, even in mixed company. It never seems to bother anyone much. Maybe I’m missing something, but I can’t tell you what it is. Could it be Nader’s planned increase of the minimum wage to $10 an hour? That would of course be a terrible thing! Working people would have more money to spend and they would go out and spend it. Then the economy would be stimulated and um, er I lost my train of thought…
Anyway, Nader has the unmitigated gall to insist on an end to the war. That would be a bad thing. If the war is ended then less people will die and the USA wouldn’t be spending hundreds on billions of dollars killing people and blowing things up…………..um, er
But anyway, Nader wants to put in place a single payer national health care plan. That would be bad. That would mean the EVERYONE would have health coverage and even poor people would be able to see a doctor, instead of dying on the waiting room floor like that poor woma in Brooklyn, ummmmmmmm
None of that came out right. Both mcCain and Obama are against everything Nader is for. Since McCain and Obama are from the two real parties, they must be right, so Nader is wrong. SO THERE!
Then there’s this silly fight over offshore drilling. What’s the big deal. People can have sex wherever they choose! There are bigger issues. The Bush administration has flip flipped twice on it’s pledge to never negotiate with terrorists. Not only are they sending someone to talk with those Iran guys, they are going to have a poetry reading by the National Organization of Woman in the white house rose garden! Everyone knows that if you let those feminazis in the gate all kinds of things will go on. There will be bra burnings and birth control pill popping. SOMEONE MAY GO SO FAR AS TO INVITE THE DIXIE CHICKS! Next thing you know, there will be a vegan pot luck dinner in the grand ballroom and George W. Bush will be driving a foreign made hybrid automobile! This is too unrepublican for the countries own good!
I realize that chairman Boehner of the House Unrepublican Activities Committee has his head up his ass, but I must ask him to convene a special session in regards to all this unrepublican activity! If something isn’t done soon, THIS COULD BE THE YEAR THAT A CANDIDATE FROM OUTSIDE THE TWO PARTY SYSTEM GETS ELECTED PRESIDENT!
2 Comments
July 17, 2008 at 11:41 am
I am for the idea of birth control pill popping and weird metal, ceramic, and oilbased birth control hardware.
This is a concervitive idea that will strenthen the hold of the republicans in the white house. When money is spent the demicrats and liberals are winning.
Birth control should be found in candy dishes on busses, at every public restroom. Wherever people buy alcohaul. At resteraunts.
July 17, 2008 at 1:43 pm
I thought the NAACP buried the “N” word in Detroit a couple of years ago. If memory serves me correctly, JJ was in attendance. Maybe he dug up the corpse and hid it in his basement for later use.